A Land For Tards
by KattheKat
Summary: Join us in a competition to find out who is the strongest and weakest player in a little game called Minecraft! We each roll dice to determine our house, weapons, food and much more! Will the vegetarian, the sarcastic ass, the dumbass or Steve win? Read our awesomeness to find out and review to guess who will die or win the epic competition!
1. Meeting the Players

It's just me. I'm alone in this land. A Land For… Tards. Yes, indeed it is quite an unusual name, but did you really suspect this fan fiction to be serious? Even if I tried, there's no use! I mean… how is it possible for Minecraft-A.K.A the game with block piggies-to be serious? Anyways, let me just continue with my story.

This is about four players in Minecraft who will fight or survive to the death by rolling dice and, depending on what number they get, will determine their house, weapons, armor, food and everything else. Who will win? Who will die in the fiery pits of Nether land? Will someone get pissed on? Find out in A Land For Tards!

Let's meet the players, eh? (No I'm not Canadian)

***I put down what my friends wanted for these, so please don't mind AnonFunnyBunny for being such a dumbass. Thank you.**

**MeowMeowMeow13**

**Name: **I am the great and powerful MeowMeowMeow13. (Author name: KattheKat)

**Strength**: Riding a piggy with a saddle and carrots. Lots and lots of carrots. o.O (CARROT ORGY!)

**Weakness**: Piggy avalanches. I tend to stop and pet every single one until or unless I die.

**Clothing**: Blue PewDiePie shirt, grey pants (jeans)

**Best weapon**: Diamond sword (I swing my sword, sword, sword, my diamond sword, sword, sword! :D)

**Armor**: Butter!

**Notes**: I meow a lot and use words such as ermagerr! (Oh my God!) Even though I love kitties I love piggies _way_ more. I hate ducks! (Chickens) Also, I'm a vegetarian, therefore so is my character. Yay, apples!

**AnonFunnyBunny**

**Name:** I am the AnonFunnyBunny of awesomeness! (Author name: AnonymousFunnyBunnyInc)

**Strength: **Sticks.

**Weakness:** Sticks.

**Clothing: **Leaves.

**Best weapon: **The feather! Causes great damage! LIES *America does not approve*

**Armor: **Diamonds (Everything's better with diamond armor! Unless you DIE :))))

**Notes: **Hates nature, rides wild chickens, and occasionally pisses on Steve. No one really likes Steve anyways…

**Alyx Link**

**Name: **Alyx Link, the sarcastic ass! (Author name: tsundereIggy1)

**Strength: **Forest fires

**Weakness: **The annoying sounds of the goddamn skeletons X(

**Clothing: **Black tank top, dark green kackies, and black converse. Like a bau5

**Best weapon: **FIIIRRREEEE!

**Armor: **Diamonds

**Notes: **A total goddamn sarcastic ass, what do you think? And meows frequently X)

**And then there's Steve...**

**Name: **Steve

**Strength: **Apples and cake

**Weakness: **Getting hit by a mob

**Clothing: **Blue shirt

**Best weapon: **Swords

**Armor: **Gold

**Notes: **Gets peed on at the most random times and is very boring. The other players wish to kill him with all their hearts.

So there you have it! All of the epic players (And Steve) who are ready to compete with each other in the Land For Tards (The actual land name). Will the vegetarian win? We highly doubt it... Who will? We need to stop asking questions or else you'll kill all of us.

Please review telling us who you think should or will win in the end!


	2. Rolling The Die

Welcome one and all to the Minecraft role playing game: A Land for Tards! In this chapter, we will be deciding many things for our players by rolling our die. Keep in mind that everything we land on will change the outcome of the ending. Aaaaaannnd… let's begin our game of death.

**Biome Key:** 1-2=Snowy 3-4=Sandy 5=Grassy 6=Underwater

MeowMeowMeow13 rolls for what biome her house will land on and gets a one. Snowy.

AnonFunnyBunny rolls next and gets a three. Sandy.

Alyx Link rolls and gets a three. Sandy.

Steve gets a six. Underwater.

Goddamn Steve always gets the coolest stuff. Now let's roll for our weapons!

**Weapon Key:** 1=Diamond Sword 2-4= Feather 5=Stone Sword 6=Fire

MeowMeowMeow13 rolls for what weapon she'll get and gets a four. Feather. Shit.

AnonFunnyBunny rolls and gets a six. Fire.

Alyx Link rolls and gets a six. Fire.

Steve gets a three. Feather.

Well… looks like the goddamn bunny gets the best weapon out of us. Shit. What fun! Now let's see what our houses will be made of!

**Home Key**: 1= Butter! (Gold) 2-4= Dirt 5= Stone 6=Glass

MeowMeowMeow13 rolls for what her house will be built with and gets a five. Stone.

AnonFunnyBunny rolls and gets a six. Glass.

Alyx Link rolls and gets a one. Butter!

Steve gets a four. Dirt.

Yes! The vegetarian is ahead on the house thingy! Muahaha! Next is the food we'll have packed.

**Food in backpack:** 1-3= Nothing 4= two apples 5= 20 cakes 6= 5 steaks

MeowMeowMeow13 rolls for what food she'll have packed (Please no steak, please no steak) and gets a five. 20 cakes. (YEAAAHHH!)

AnonFunnyBunny rolls and gets a four. Two apples.

Alyx Link rolls and gets a three. Nothing.

Steve gets a one. Nothing.

MUAHAHA! Steve is such a loser. So, in the end of this chapter, here is what everyone is left with:

**MeowMeowMeow13**= A house made of stone in a snowy land with 20 cakes in her backpack and a feather as a weapon.

**AnonFunnyBunny**= A house made of glass built on a sandy area with fire as a deadly weapon and two apples as food.

**Alyx Link**= Lives in a sandy area inside a house made of golden ores with no food and fire as a weapon.

**Steve**= Lives underwater in a house built out of dirt, he has no food and lastly, a mere feather as a weapon.

Join us in the next chapter when we actually play the freaking game!


End file.
